You can bump into a narcissist around every corner in Lebanon. The inflated male egos and the entitled “I don’t work, I’m a princess” females being the vast majority. They are the most difficult people to deal with and they take up much of your mental capacity to figure out how to manage them. The irony is they don’t give you a second thought unless they need you or they’re about to lose you.
This personality type is the most hurtful and rigid. Who doesn’t have at least one in their everyday life?
Clinical psychologist Dr. Ramani Durvasula recently appeared on the Mel Robbins podcast and put her two cents in on the subject seeing as she’s one of the world’s leading experts on narcissism.
Here are four myths to shatter on the topic:
They know exactly what they’re doing, they are very much aware. It’s a strategy of sorts. They’re super charming in a party, they will make jokes, be the one everyone is dying to talk to and dance with. But once they get in the car, they flip that switch. They blow up and go off on their partner. The rage is saved for the closest to them, so you start to believe there’s something wrong with you because everyone else thinks they’re such a delight. But it’s not you. It’s them.
You are not responsible for their behavior. Their actions and overreactions are all of their own making. We tend to feel guilty and sad for being at the receiving end of their outbursts, however bearing in mind that they are wired this way will help us manage them better and thrive while having them in our lives.
They have to be held accountable for their actions, not keep using the old shtick of blaming it on their rough childhood. The way they are may be in part a trauma response but in no way does it justify constantly hurting the people they love.
The 4th myth is they are capable of change. They are not. Their personality is more unyielding than the rest of us and personalities are already difficult to adjust. They are less likely to go to therapy, and if they did, to stick with it. To our dismay, they are hell-bent on their arrogant and egotistical ways.
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